At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
Randomize