Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Randomize