The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
Randomize
