ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
Randomize
