i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Randomize
