if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
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