i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
Randomize
