With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
We need a shit load of segways right now
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
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