I can feel you judging me through the phone.
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
