I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
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