You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
Randomize
