I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
Randomize
