its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
Randomize
