Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
Randomize
