after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
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