Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
