I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
