Ambien. No doubt about it.
He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
Randomize
