The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Randomize
