Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Randomize
