The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
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