You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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