I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
