Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
Randomize
