He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
