Buhtt sex?
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Randomize
