Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Randomize
