I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
Randomize
