More tranny stories later!
update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
Randomize
