i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
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