I would go down on you faster than GM stock
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize
