Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
come pick me up. please. i just puked in my lap. bring pants.
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
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