Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
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