and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
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