And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Randomize