I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
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