hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
Randomize
