what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
Randomize
