that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
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