The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
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