Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
I want you more than these girls want KFC
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Randomize
