just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
Randomize
