So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
Randomize