Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
I have surprise drugs for everyone
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Randomize
