My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
At the hospital, the nurse kept telling me that i either had appendicitis, a tubular pregnancy, or an ovarian cyst. I kept asking if i could just have chlamydia instead...
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
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