i'm returning your mother's day gift to finance my alcoholism over the next week.
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
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