PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Randomize