just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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