You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
Boobs are out for the taking
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Randomize
