Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
Randomize
