i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
